Simon Kinberg’s “The 355” opens with a logo for Freckle Films, the production company of its star, Jessica Chastain, and SKGENRE, which is the filmmaker’s own company and initials.

It’s a quick reminder that Kinberg and Chastain are reuniting here for the first time since his prior film and directorial debut, “X-Men: Dark Phoenix.” For some, this would present a warning, though I approached optimistically, as I’m one of possibly four people on planet Earth who really liked that film.

After a few minutes of their new film, it’s clear that this is no “X-Men: Dark Phoenix,” which was uneven and had a troubled production history but emerged a potent, thematically rich and enthralling work. “The 355,” on the other hand, is a total fiasco.

We begin with what appears to be a Colombian drug deal, but is actually a set up for the film’s McGuffin, a drive…

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